—by Carla
The past week has been full of news about the death of a legend and also about the sentencing of a scam artist. But Michael Jackson and Bernie Madoff will go down in history for very different reasons. One was motivated by money and greed, the other (and I can only guess) by a deep desire to be loved and accepted.
Not many of us will ever be able to relate to either one, that’s pretty obvious. I don’t just mean MJ’s talent, either. I will never know what it must have felt like to get a check for $200,000 as a 12-year-old and being told I could spend it on whatever I wanted. But beyond that, I don’t know that I will ever understand how MJ ended up with anything less than a hundred gazillion dollars in the bank. We keep hearing over and over these past few days that he was nearly half a billion dollars in debt when he died. How in the world does that happen? Earning that much money over the course of your entire life must really do something to a person. I’m not sure what that is, but it does something. Because once you have it all, what else can you buy? There seems to have been a deep emptiness inside of Micheal Jackson that money could never fill.
Madoff, on the other hand, seems to have had no soul. Ripping people off solely for his own gain seemed perfectly fine to him. Just another day at the office. And for what? More stuff, I guess. A fancier car, a swankier pad, a yacht maybe. Who knows. But neither man had a happy ending.
As for me, I can’t say I’ve ever been that chick who was motivated by money. I do like nice things, but I’ve never been motivated by money. And that mindset may have helped me when I was laid off since I could see beyond the absent paycheck…and life wasn’t going to be so bad. Hopefully the nearly half a million people who lost their jobs just last month feel the same way.
{July 3, 2009}
I Don’t Get These Guys…
{May 13, 2009}
The Super Sexy Recession List
OK mamas and papas… popular guy magazine, Maxim, has revealed its annual “Hot 100 List.”
No surprise here, But I did not make the list AGAIN. (I’m so joking!)
For the clueless… here’s how the magazine describes itself: “covering sex, sports, beer, hot babes, gadgets, fitness, and other topics for men.”
The magazine’s “Hot 100 List” offers pictures and a brief description of really beautiful and often scantily clad girls. (but who cares unless you’re into that sort of thing, here’s the link if you are)
http://www.maxim.com/girls/hot-100/79081/2009-hot-100-100-91.html?p=100
Anyway… the list made the wheels in my head start turning. I know it’s dangerous when this happens, but just put on your helmets because here we go.
I was thinking what if there were a “Hot 100 Recession List”?
Ok. So a tanking economy doesn’t seem very sexy… but we can pretend. Just for grins lets call it the “Super Sexy Recession List.” I personally don’t have time to think of 100. But here’s my top 5.
5. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac–
These two used to look so good that we could sop “em up with a biscuit. Houses and kisses for anyone that applied! They were so adorable that everyone wanted to pat ’em on the head and squeeze their rosy little cheeks. But they’ve gone from cute and cuddly to total embarrassing mess.
Star equivalent: The Olsen Twins
4. Bailout Bill-
This bad boy looked pretty good at first and had some of us begging for more. But his quick and dirty ways soon left us feeling a little used. Wham, bam thank you ma’am. Now we need a trip to the free clinic.
Star equivalent: Motley Crue drummer, Tommy Lee
lindsay lo's mug shot
3. Hedge Funds-
These hot little numbers were popping up like reality TV and wildflowers in the Texas Hill Country. They were everywhere and making LOTS of money. But now they’re all dried up like a bad bag of potpourri stuck in the back of grandma’s closet.
Star equivalent: Lindsay Lohan and the cast of The Hills
"The Hills" girls
2. Bernie Madoff- (famed Ponzi schemer)
This guy wasn’t easy on the eyes… but he was dynamite with the money. How else could he have gotten into to bed with so many Hollywood types? Such a smooth talker too. Charities, retirees, friends and family handed their money over with glee… only to be knocked out cold later.
Star equivalent- Mike Tyson
Brit's back, bitches.
1. Wall Street-
This little temptress has been claiming victims for years. But she really got around in 2008. Everything was perfect for a while. But now she’s more unpredictable than a guerrilla on anti-depressants. Get involved if you dare.
Star equivalent- Britney Spears and Amy Winehouse
Amy Winehouse
There you have it… the top 5 of the “Super Sexy Recession List.” I don’t know about you, but it’s made me “hot and bothered.”
“Hot” as in “mad” and “bothered” as in “worried.” How did we get here gang? And when will we get back to the peachy keen days?
I need star equivalent- Doris Day and Jimmy Stewart
Doris Day and Jimmy Stewart
Recession Mama 